Just When I Thought I had Heard Everything!

There are some days as a teacher that you just can’t explain.  I seriously thought that there wasn’t much I have heard that could surprise me.  Today I found out very quickly that I was wrong. Within the first three minutes of school starting my mind was blown.  It was proven once again that there is no limit to the weirdness that comes with kids.  Until my teaching days are over, I will never again say that I have heard everything.

It started off as a pretty good Tuesday.  My students were in there seats and relatively quiet when the bell rang.  That usually is my way of knowing what kind of day it will be.

Then it happened.

One of my girls came up to my desk.  We will call her JJ.  JJ came to me and let me know she didn’t have her homework today because her mom threw away all the papers from her backpack.  Before I had a chance to ask why, she went ahead and told me why.  Apparently her mom had gone through her backpack the night before and found something.  This is a moment in any parent’s life that you wonder where you went wrong.  This poor mom opened her daughter’s backpack just trying to be a responsible parent and looking at what her daughter had brought home that day.  What she found was a little different.  As she opened her daughter’s backpack, inside she found a dead rat!!!  Holy SH*T!! A dead rat!!

My eyes shot open as I was definitely not expecting to hear that from JJ.  I sat and thought for a minute, then I had to ask it.  “How JJ, did a dead rat get into your backpack?”  I was waiting for her to tell me that she had a rat in her apartment and it got into her backpack and died.  Logical answer.  Still gross, but logical.  Instead, she tells me a little story of how when she left school yesterday, she happened to stumble upon a dead rat.  I looked at her with horror on my face and asked my second question.  “Please JJ, tell me you didn’t pick it up and put it in there?”  She didn’t answer.  She didn’t need to.  She put her head down in shame and I knew.

SHE PICKED UP A DEAD RAT WITH HER BARE HANDS AND PUT IT IN HER BACKPACK!!!

I did not ask my third question.  The very simple question of WHY??  I didn’t want to know.

She then looks at me dead faced, like this was a normal conversation, and said “That’s why I don’t have my homework.”

It is very strange that this story made two boys having a discussion about marrying their moms seem normal.  That is the type of day it has been.

Guess I have another story to tell.

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13 comments

  1. Book Dragon · March 5

    This slice is priceless! I’ll keep in mind, from this point forward, I can’t claim I’ve heard everything – that is until the day I retire.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am sitting him with my mouth open… I don’t have words! That will be a hard one to top!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. amyilene · March 5

    Clearly, I have not heard it all…

    Liked by 1 person

  4. litcoachconnection · March 5

    This is one of the many reasons that I love being a teacher – there is never a dull moment! Thanks for sharing your story!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. zasadilj · March 5

    After hearing this story at lunch, I am so glad that you found a moment to write it down. You really can’t make this stuff up.

    Like

  6. Sara T. · March 5

    This story is horrifying and hilarious! Only because I’m not this child’s parent or teacher.

    Like

  7. Lori Seidelman · March 6

    So glad you wrote about this after hearing it in lunch. It is definitely one to remember! I thought finding moldy snacks in kindergarten lockers was gross-this tops that anyday. Good thing YOU didn’t find it!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • mcteaguem · March 6

      That is absolutely true. I would’ve probably swore.

      Like

  8. terisblog302496239 · March 6

    I cannot even imagine what I would have done if I were that parent. What an unforgettable story!

    Like

  9. berries781 · March 6

    Ahhhhhhhh!!!! This makes me afraid to open my sons backpack! 😨😬😧

    Like

  10. eugeniakouts · March 7

    A few thoughts . .

    I am grateful she did not tell you she found it in the school!
    I am grateful she did not pull it out for “Show and Tell”.
    I will pay you large amounts of money to make sure she is NOT in my class in a couple of years!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. mcteaguem · March 7

    Ha ha!! We would’ve had some issues if that came to school. She’s is a sweet girl, she just may be interested in taxidermy.

    Like

  12. Shelly · March 8

    Mark, I just can’t even!

    Like

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